How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
We have so much sex to catch up on
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
