actually, I'm a sock model
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
