Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
