you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
