You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
birth control should be required to get into college
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
