I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
My breasts were aching with rage.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize