1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize