My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
