THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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