fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
