yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
