did you get engaged???
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
