I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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