Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize