My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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