you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize