you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize