He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Come see our sink grown plant.
We had to coat check the pizza.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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