Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
