i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
