He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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