I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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