you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
