Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
