She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize