Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom

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(804): View more from Virginia

I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.

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(+48): View more from Poland

there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover

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(773): View more from Illinois

That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line

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(440): View more from Ohio

She swung at the pinata with crutches

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(905): View more from Ontario

I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight

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(850): View more from Florida

Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices

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(909): View more from California

There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.

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