I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
