Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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