Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Randomize
