that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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