it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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