Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Randomize