I hate all girls vehemently.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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