If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
