now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
