God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
