is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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