is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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