nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
