she was so not down for the gang bang
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
