i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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