He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Randomize
