Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
