nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Randomize
