one two three fourrrrnication!
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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