Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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