Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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