Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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