I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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