Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
