please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
