I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
